Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Pack Horse Mommy

 I saw this picture on Facebook yesterday. I don't know where it came from but it totally summed up what happened when I got home.

Yesterday I started my maternity leave. My doctor gave me a note to work half days from now until delivery and HR didn't want to do that because I'm a teacher so they made me just start leave. I'm OK with this because when I counted the days, I should be in the safe zone for not having to return to work this school year (woot!) and honestly I really need the rest. My body has been struggling through this pregnancy and I've been in a lot of pain for weeks now. I would leave work limping some days, my legs and back and belly aching in a way I didn't even know was possible. So even though working makes the days go by faster, I am happy to be taking some time for me.

So yesterday afternoon I had a doctor's appointment and then I went to pick up my son from daycare. He always has to take a bunch of crap with him in the morning and it gets kind of annoying. A blanket for the car, a toy (or 2, or 3, or 4...) and his backpack for bringing home all the stuff he makes. We get home and I'm trying to get him out of the car and the next thing I know I've got my purse, a backpack, a blanket, a toy, my Tervis tumbler and a few other things overloading me. He then decides he needs more crap out of the bag of crap I keep in the car to keep him entertained when he forgets something. And guess what? He wants me to carry it.

I'm already tired and achy and cranky so I might have been a bit snappy. After I struggled to unlock the back door while loaded down like a pack horse, he refused to take off his shoes and a fight ensued that ended with him in time out.

Toddlers are great y'all. GREAT!

A week and half until #2 arrives. Whose idea was this again? Surely not mine.....

Sunday, March 5, 2017

The land of Wal Mart

I do not frequent brick and mortar stores like I used to, well maybe except for Target because I am a mom and if you're a mom, you get that. But Target is it's own amazing shopping experience and almost always pleasant.

Wal Mart is your last ditch resort.

It's been awhile since my dog's flea and tick meds ran out and I don't worry much about it in the winter because she's not really outside much or around other dogs so I usually give myself a financial break during the winter months.  Plus since I switched vets she somehow ended up with 2 annual visits a year which ends up being a fair amount of money. I'm trying to make it to July for her next appointment so we are back to one a year.

Anyways, with all the warmer weather I've thinking it's probably time to get her back on some bug prevention. I usually go with the oral medication because of my toddler but a friend swears by the cheap stuff she gets at Wal Mart and  she has 3 or 4 dogs and a few cats so I figured if they work for her, they must be good enough for my dog. It's the kind that goes on their neck and is way cheaper so when B and I were over that way last week, I figured we would stop in Wal Mart and grab some.

Now, some Wal Marts are great. When I was in college I loved going to the local Wal Mart. Granted it was pretty much all we had in the small town, but it was clean and organized and we always managed to find fun things. Not so with out Wal Mart here.

When this Wal Mart was first built there was literally nothing in the area. There was a gas station, a car repair shop and a general store. Literally, barely even a dot on a map. Then all of a sudden someone bought a large chunk of land and BOOM there's this thing call Wal Mart that none of us had ever seen before. We didn't even know what it was. We quickly fell in love because it was one stop shopping and kept us from having to drive back across the river for everything. It wasn't long after that that the area exploded. When Wal Mart came, everything else followed and now the once tiny, insignificant dot on a map no one had heard of, has turned into a shopping and dining mecca. It really is insane how much the area has grown and changed in the last 20 years. You really have to know the area well to get around with any amount of ease and you have to know what times of day are best to go.

The weirdest part of the area to me now is Wal Mart. It hasn't totally kept up with the times and it attracts people that don't live in the area. I seriously have no idea where they come from. Locals go to the Target that is literally right behind the Wal Mart.

So I sucked it up and went into the Wal Mart the other day for the sake of my dog. When we walked in the door, my son immediately turned into a weirdo. He started punching himself in the chest and then yelling out "Stop hitting me!!!" I tried to get him to stop because I didn't want people to think I was hurting my child. He never does this and of course chose a moment in public to try it out. Thanks kid.

Once I got him calm we wandered around looking for a storage container I remembered I needed. We landed in the home goods department and I finally found what I was looking for between answering two thousand questions from my son. Then I stumbled upon a futon with a giant poop emoji bean bag on it. Now, I think the poop emoji is cute, but I would never buy a giant shit themed pillow for my house, or even my kids room. Blown away by the sheer size of this, I stopped to take a picture. My child decided he was exhausted from walking around and sat in the Big Joe bean bag chair that was on the lowest shelf right behind us.

Me: "Don't sit there it is going to fall"
My child: Chair falls off shelf as he sits on it.
Me: Sigh

I lean down to put the chair back and that's when I see it. Someone had chowed down on a piece of fried chicken and tossed the bone behind the chair. WTF.

Thoroughly disgusted I grabbed my child and dragged him back to the pet department just wanting to get out of there. I found what I needed and headed for check out. On the way out this nice older lady stops and stares at him and asks how old.

Me: "He's three."
Lady: "Oh he is adorable!"
Me: Smile politely "Thank you!" and start walking again, dragging B with me.

I can be a very outgoing person, but sometimes I just want to be left alone. This is one of those times.

As we are headed for the check out, this lady walks by. She looks to be about mid thirties and is pushing a child in a cart. I cannot tell you whether it was a boy or a girl because all I could focus on was the lady. She was dressed in pajamas. Not just any pajamas, unicorn pajamas. The type that looks like a costume with a hood that looks like a unicorn head. And she even had on slippers. I did the slow head turn and watched her as she walked by. She was babbling on her phone so she didn't notice me rudely staring.

We finally made it to check out and I did self check out thinking that would be faster. Of course not. After I paid, the machine couldn't print the receipt because it was out of paper. So I waited for someone to notice that I needed help and then waited while they changed the paper. Next thing I know, the old lady from early appears by my side and starts talking to me about my child again. Congrats on reaching creeper status. She tells me all about her kids and how far apart in age they are and I tried to stand there and be nice and smile but all I could concentrate on was how much I just wanted to get the hell out of there and go home so I could lay on the couch because I'm 8 months pregnant and miserable. I eventually had to cut her off when the WM employee finally gave me my receipt and yanked B out the door.

In short, our Wal Mart attracts some interesting things. Paying the vet the extra money is probably worth it.